March 21st, 2006 by Dale Kentucky |
The dating world has changed drastically as we have entered the computer age. Gone away are the days of meeting a potential mate in a bar or coyly slipping your phone number to the Starbucks Frappucino maker. Now, many people are turning to the warm glow of the computer screen in the hopes that they will be lucky in e-love.
People are all but glued to their laptops, wi-fi P.D.A.s, and internet capable phones, so it is really no surprise that many men and women are looking for their soul-mate online as well. With the whole world connected through these technologies, it makes for a whole lot more fish in a much bigger sea.
One of the advantages that women find in using the World Wide Web to find a man is that women can prescreen potential dates through what a man puts on his profile. Through the online profile a woman has a window into what the man that she may be interested in, is really like. This is a much better processes than the old method of “20 Questions” with a guy at a bar. The same goes for a man. The man can look at the profile of a woman and decide whether she is potential date material by comparing interests, turn-ons, and turn-offs without blowing a week’s worth of pay on drinks for a woman who is strategically working her way around the world, ensuring that she is good and tipsy without spending a dime.
It is for this reason that a man’s online profile is so important. Your profile should tell about you in a way that is to the point, but also sounds as though your profile is the only profile a woman should read. “I don’t know what to put here” under any heading in your profile is unacceptable. List your best characteristics without sounding too conceited or full of yourself. Also remember that most women are not impressed by cheesy “pick up line” type answers to the questions in a profile questionnaire. Your online profile is a delicate balance of a flattering reflection on yourself and humility. Many men really struggle to find a middle ground with their online profiles. One great way to find out more about your best qualities without giving yourself a big head is to ask those who care the most about you, to describe you. Ask your friends to name a few things about you that make you good company to keep.
Another important thing to keep in mind is that honesty really is the best policy, and this definitely includes finding a woman online. Your profile, your picture, and your emails to women online should all be honest. Do not take a picture of you and photoshop it to remove those blemishes on your face, or add a little more hair on top, where hair no longer grows. If you meet a woman who you think has serious potential, she is going to meet the real you in real life. Women want to know the truth about the man she is meeting online. There is no deal breaker bigger than when a man lies about himself online and the truth comes out in the “real life date”. Even the most techno savvy of women are cautious about meeting men from offline because of the horror stories that circulate on the news and in forwarded emails. The last thing a woman wants is to find that a man has lied about details of himself either in his profile or his correspondence with her. Even if you have a few extra pounds, or you’re not as rich as “The Jones’” don’t withhold those things. Just as a woman wants to know the real you, don’t you want the woman to fall head over heels for you, and not a fictionalized version of yourself?
After you have established a line of contact between you and a potential mate now is the time to wow her. Be honest in your emails but also, really let your personality shine. You would be amazed at how much a woman will read into your emails, and how well a woman can sense you in your emails to her. Sexual innuendos in your emails are fine, but keep in mind that not all women will jump into such flirtations quickly. Feed off of the emails and instant messenger conversations from her so that you can take a queue from her as to how far and how quickly she wants to cover topics of a racier persuasion. More than anything, don’t let your “other head” rule in your conversations with women. Women desire romance, not lust, chivalry, not chauvinism. Be yourself, and you will hook more fish than if you use a flashy lure.
Chet Rowland is the author of several courses and dvds on online dating for men. For more information and a free course on meeting women visit chetsdatingsystem.com chetsdatingsystem.com
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